.the reason.

this is her... my awe inspiring paragon. no journal type documentation would be complete without the writing of a relationship.

she is poetry in motion. the depth of her caring is unknown and her life is a page turning novel. i've never met an individual of the likes who has the daring and compassion as her.

of course, no relation is without bumps and bruises and together we are no exception which will also be documented accordingly, but for right now, at this moment she is the living entity of happiness.

.the opportunity cliche.

today one of the great football coaches of all time (even though his winning record is only 53.4% wins), Dan Reeves, chose to end his season early with three games left to play in the season. with only two winning seasons over the past seven years it's understandable why the Atlana Falcons front office was planning to release him anyhow. aware of his fate at the end of december, he chose to do it upon his own terms and make it final now.

"A window's been closed but a door is open," he said. "I'm interested in seeing what it is."

on Tuesday i was denied readmission back into UCF. when i left i had a .625 overall GPA; two years later it's now a 2.8 and climbing with an Associates soon behind it. apparently that just isn't good enough to them...

but i have to press on and like Dan said, there are other ways in the world.

in the works i'm still waiting on acceptance letters from USF, FIU, and UNF; but in the meanwhile i'm continuing my efforts at Valencia Community College (which really is a great place to start; thanks for arguing with me, mom).

for everyone who showed me respect and gave condolences, i thank you and i'm grateful to know that you find my drive to be role model-esk and honorable, but i do ask that you stop it and save your breath for somebody who wants excuses instead of professional recognition.

anyway... for a little humor:

.turning point.

tomorrow (officially 9:00am eastern time) will be the day that all my upcoming decisions currently in limbo will either fall into a nether void or after a 2 and a half year escapade will finally be cemented into a second chance of redemption.

this is my documentation of the time after tomorrow; the events and thoughts that occur and the things that i wish would've happend afterwards.

i'm so nervous i've been eating ice cream all day. i hope i don't get sick and miss my meeting.

here's all you need to know; my readmission essay:

"As I entered college life in the fall of the year 2000, I became immersed in the freedom within the opportunity I had been given. Emerging from high school with a feeling of indelible accomplishment, I lacked the maturity to understand my fundamental responsibilities. In the course of my freshman year, I placed the needs of a festive sociability over my academics. Even after being placed on academic probation and losing my immensely needed scholarships, I continued failing to realize the importance of higher education in my life.

It is now been two and half years since being disqualified from the University of Central Florida and over this period of time it’s been my hardest lesson. Though cliché in a sense, it is the truth. I’ve rebooted my educational career at Valencia Community College where after this semester I will earn my Associates Degree in general studies. When I first started there I was unsure of myself as far as my own abilities to learn, but gradually I’ve developed the knowledge as to how I can and cannot become successful. During my turning point I’ve moved away from the college atmosphere into a one bedroom apartment where the temptation to deter my studies is almost nonexistent. My own personal drive to prove to my peers, family, and myself that I am not a failure is not my only goal at this moment, but it embodies a major influence in the choices I currently make.

I’ve seen friends and acquaintances fall back to their respective homes in defeat, but my resilience has brought me far enough to where I now have another chance to make my dream of contributing my effort to the world very tangible. I wish to continue the journey from where I left off, in hopes that I can erase my past mistakes and become the best at what I will become."