for labor day weekend, i took a trip to orlando with my family. despite their best efforts, i insisted on driving; not so i could play loud music, not so i had an opportunity to smoke, not so that i can blame my dad for driving slow, but for a whole other reason that remains secret with the exception of a select few.
it all started in high school when i had my first car accident... and then my second accident... and then my third... and when i went to college and had another accident at a yield sign... and then another during a light, drizzling rain... and then being involved in three more accidents within the cars of my friends. you see, i've experienced the not-so-joyous laws of physics eight times too many and the effects have left me... twitchy.
for example... the other day, i rode with joseph, who is fully aware of my fear of being a passanger, to buy chinese for dinner. it was raining pretty bad, so i paniced and covered my eyes whenever i saw break lights flash from the traffic ahead and not feeling joseph's car slow down. completely annoyed(and for personal enjoyment of watching my squirm), he began speeding, tail-gating, and braking as hard as possible. i am proud to say i didn't scream this time, but my ability to yell streams of profanity was uninhibited.
some have called it a trust issue. this problem has nothing to do with trust, dammit; this is a "i don't want whiplash, see you lose your car, and stand around for hours waiting for the police to show up while others slow down traffic just to take a glance at our discomfort" issue. the only cure i've found so far is driving my own car... or closing my eyes during the scary parts.
trip notes:
- my cousins know how to talk shit
- evidentally, florida is the worst place to live
- even if they are in the same room, my parents will still watch 2 TVs
- i can trash a home in less than 36 hours
- you can push any object with your car as long as you keep it under 3 miles an hour
- now that the blue tape(hot lava) is gone from the stairs, it's now deemed "normal lava"
- i told you we should've gone to bahama breeze...